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“Free Throws Win Ball Games”

How UConn Basketball Star Donovan Clingan carries his late mom, Stacey, with him on and off the court

When Connecticut men’s basketball star Donovan Clingan thinks of basketball and his mom, one particular story comes to mind.

He was in eighth grade playing travel basketball and his mom, Stacey Porrini Clingan, in the midst of cancer treatment, was in the stands. Donovan, a big man on the court even then and now 7-foot-3, was getting fouled continually throughout the game.

Stacey was an excellent player in her own time, enjoying stellar high school and collegiate careers at Bristol Central High School (Conn.) and the University of Maine, respectively, and recently inducted into the university’s Sports Hall of Fame. At 6-foot-4, she was a great athlete. She held the rebounding record at Bristol Central for years, until Donovan came along.

But, at that game in Donovan’s eighth grade year, Stacey was sure to let the referees know they were missing calls. She was standing up for her son.

“The refs weren’t making any calls and she actually ended up getting ejected out of the game from the stands,” Donovan said while smiling. “And that just showed you how much she cared about me.”

Basketball was their thing. And now, in her absence, it’s a way for him to stay connected to her.

Stacey was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2010 when Donovan was around six years old. She fought for a few years before the cancer went into remission. Donovan was young and didn’t fully see what was going on, but he knew his mom beat cancer, had started teaching again and was back to normal.

Then, about five years later, the cancer came back and spread. This time, being a young teenager, Donovan witnessed what his mom was going through. It was a long battle of doctor’s appointments, hospital visits, treatments and more.

Donovan Clingan, UConn men's basketball player

“It was just hard seeing everything she was doing, still trying to be the best mother possible, still trying to be the best teacher possible,” Donovan said. “But at the same time, she’s fighting one of the most deadly diseases in the world.”

It was hard. Donovan didn’t have all the answers. He couldn’t make this go away. But what he could do is put a smile on her face.

“I understood how sick she was, but I really never could understand how she felt and what was going through her head. I was just trying to be there as best I could for her, and tried to support her through the rough times because I know my sister and I were her prized possessions, so seeing a smile on my face and seeing a smile on my sister’s face is something that always kept her going.

“After a long day of chemo, after a long day of work, seeing the pain she was in every night, it was definitely a hard time. But I know she’s in a better place now. She’s not in pain anymore, that’s the only thing I care about.”

Stacey passed away in 2018, eight years after her original diagnosis of breast cancer. Not a day goes by that Donovan doesn’t think of his mom.

After she passed, he switched his number 23 jersey to wear 32, the number she wore. He was a top prospect in high school and could have had his choice of the elite prep schools around the country. But, Bristol Central was their school.

“I just wanted to stay there to represent my mom just because she had a great impact on my life. I wanted my name to be right next to hers on the leaderboard. I carried that over to college and now I’m still wearing 32 to try to represent her. I know every day and every game she’s looking down on me, smiling, and probably yelling at me for missing my free throws. But I know she’s proud of me.”

On December 5, Donovan will wear her #32 on his back as he takes the floor at Madison Square Garden for the Jimmy V Classic. A battle between two blue blood programs, UConn versus North Carolina, means so much more. Donovan is quick to describe the importance of cancer research, and the importance of the V Foundation.

“To compete in such a historic event like the Jimmy V Classic means a lot to me, means a lot to this team,” Donovan said. “But for me to play for a cause that has affected me and my family means a lot. I’ve seen his [Jim Valvano’s] speech and how impactful it’s been to me and how much it hit my heart.

When he says it might not help him, but it might help others, it’s true. Sometimes it’s hard to save someone’s life within a short period of time. But helping the V Foundation is important because it can help save other people’s lives.”

After winning the NCAA Championship last year as a freshman, this year the expectations are just as high and the lights are just as bright. Even more eyes are on Donovan, and his stardom is only growing. But, there are simple things that keep him grounded in who he is – the kind, likeable, gentle giant.

Donovan Clingan, UConn men's basketball player

“Something that sticks with me is on my mom’s headstone, we wrote “free throws win ball games”. Because after every game that was decided by a close score, it always comes down to who made the free throws and who didn’t. So, that’s something that always sticks with me and something that my mom always taught me.”

Making your free throws seems like a simple task – taking the unguarded, ‘free’ shot 15 feet from the basket. But there’s so much more behind it – countless hours in the gym, thousands of shots up when no one is around – so, when the pressure is on, the noise is loud and the game is on the line, you’re prepared. It’s the little things on and off the court, like free throws, that make the difference at the end.

That’s how Donovan was raised by his mother. That’s who he is – and will continue to be in her memory.

“Victory Over Cancer® to me is still finding a way to be happy every day and enjoy your life even though you might be fighting cancer. There might still be a way to find victory; you can be happy with your family and do great things.

“There’s a lot of people out there who fought hard and did a lot of work to [try and] overcome this disease. It’s sad to say, obviously my mom didn’t overcome that fight, but I know she definitely had a lot of victories throughout her battles.”

It’s the little things that win ball games.

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